Save Dakota Fanning!

Friday, January 26, 2007



Thursday, January 25, 2007

"Don't You Want Devoted Followers?"

A layman's guide to starting his very OWN money-grubbing, mind-control cult.

Not that we're implying anything.

Can This Marriage Be Saved?!

From the National Enquirer:

Katie Holmes is so far under Tom Cruise’s control that insiders are calling her a “Stepford Wife.” The new issue of the National Enquirer has exclusive details from inside the bizarre marriage of Katie and Tom.

Tom has taken over almost every aspect of Katie’s life, even approving her clothing and friends. “Tom doesn’t want Katie wearing anything flashy – and nothing too revealing either,” one insider says. Others point out a dramatic change in Katie, from a free-spirited, independent person to a meek and submissive one, caught in Tom’s world with few friends, no career and no way out. Insiders point out that Katie even limits her phone calls to 15 minutes.

I think we'd all love to see Kat(i)e break free. But is it too late? Perhaps so. Kat(i)e may have to lie in the bed she's made for the time being, but it's NOT TOO LATE to save Dakota Fanning from such a fate.

Jesus Cruise?

Tom Cruise Compared To Christ

Tom Cruise has been named the new "Christ" of Scientology, according to the leaders of the religion.

The Mission: Impossible star has reportedly been told that he has been chosen to spread the word of his faith throughout the world.

Leader David Miscavige believes that in the future Cruise will be revered like Jesus for his work in propagating the religion.

A source told The Sun, "Tom has been told he is Scientology's Christ-like figure. Like Christ, he's been criticised for his views. But future generations will realise he was right."

Cruise joined the Church of Scientology in the 1980s and has recently risen to one of the Church's top levels.

On the one hand: terrifying.
On the other: hey, as long as we get to nail him to a cross, I can dig it.

Scientology Sends The Big Guns To Washington

Scooter Libby Loves Tom Cruise

During the anxious days of late spring 2003 inside the White House, as the rationale for the Iraq war was eroding, Scooter Libby was especially worked up one morning about a visit from a couple of VIPs. CIA official Craig Schmall testified in Libby’s perjury trial yesterday that notes he took from a June 14 intelligence briefing with Dick Cheney’s then chief of staff included this sentence: “Tom Cruise and Penelope Cruz at his office.”