Save Dakota Fanning!

Thursday, November 30, 2006

You've Lost That Lovin' FEEEEEEELIN'!

http://movies.msn.com/movies/hotgossip/11-20-06_5

Now that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have sealed their conspiracy-crammed coupling with an oh-so-uncomfortable three-minute kiss, a few of the more, oh, let's say special aspects of their Italian castle-set nuptials are emerging. Among them: People reports the groom channeled his bygone "Top Gun" alter ego Maverick as he serenaded his bride -- sans wingman Goose, unfortunately -- with the Righteous Brothers classic "You've Lost that Loving Feeling." While belting out an emotional tune about fading love (sample lyric: "You never close your eyes any more/ When I kiss your lips/And there's no tenderness like before/ In your fingertips ... It makes me just feel like crying baby/ 'Cause baby, something beautiful's dying") might seem an odd choice for a wedding reception, we suppose it's no more of a head-scratcher than how Cruise appears ever-so-slightly taller than his far more statuesque wife in their wedding photo.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

How is this the family?



Isn't nicole part of the family. Those are HER children, too.

Monday, November 20, 2006

What? Me Suri?

The most accurate depiciton of what Katie SHOULD be thinking:

Man Boobs

Cruise has been sporting man boobs (moobs) for a few months now.



We here at SaveDakota have finally figured out why.

Cruise has been NURSING SURI!!!!!!!!!!!

Whoa.

Sick.

About That Wedding Picture



Did he make her hunch way down?! She looks slouchy and bent-kneeish. It looks like her dress is dragging the ground. Plus, it looks like there's a slight bump near the knee area. It looks like she's hunching. They probably dug a nice hole for her to plant her feet in.

Is Tom's masculinity so intertwined with his height that he can't have his wife an inch or two taller? I kind of hope so, because that will make him even more pathetic than he already is, and I looooooove a pathetic Tom "Icky Creepy Drooly Old Man" Cruise.

Suri toting

Is it just me or is Tom the one holding Suri in almost every picture we see of the kid? Aside from when Suri was still entombed (allegedly) inside Katie and the one picture from the photo spread where Katie is on her back holding Suri, Tom is always carrying her.

I just saw it as yet another proof of ownership, in the same way that he's always got "Kate" by an upper-arm death grip.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Ewwww

Someone keeps searching Google for 'dakota fanning naked'.

I'm actually, honestly, disturbed by this.

The only thing worse was finding this:

http://dakotafanningnaked.6dlm.org/

What? The? FUCK?

The real reason we haven't seen Suri Cruise: a birthmark?



We've been very excited to see the new photos of Suri Cruise, 7 months old, taken this week leading up to Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes' wedding. These first candid photos of their baby are exciting for several reasons. The first is that we've been deprived of photos of her since her Vanity Fair debut, the second is that we've been deprived of candid photos of her up to this point, but thirdly because the photos reveal what may be the true reason Suri has been kept out of the public eye.



We'd like to call your attention to what appears to be a slight but distinctive birthmark located in the middle of her forehead between her eyes visible in several photos that was not visible in the Vanity Fair photos. It was rumored that there was a lot of airbrushing involved in her Vanity Fair shoot and this is what was probably airbrushed. In these new candid shots of her, her thick black hair is combed forward, most likely in an attempt to conceal the mark. Of course, it is also possible Suri fell and bruised her face.

We don't know what type of birthmark this is, but it's likely they have tried to have it removed or reduced because the color is very subtle.

From what we understand, there are three major types of birthmarks: port wine stains, hemangiomas, and vascular malformations. According to Birthmark.org and Birthmark.com, hemangiomas are reddish in color, 83% occur on the head and neck area, occur 5 times more often in females, appear at or shortly after birth, growing rapidly for first nine months and most stop growing by 18 months,can be raised, flat or both, responds to steroid treatment but only some respond to laser treatment. Port wine stains are red or purple, can appear anywhere on body, are present at birth, don't grow, are flat at birth but may slightly thicken with age, do not respond to steroid treatment but do respond to laser treatment and can change color with hot or cold temperatures.

Does the red mark on Suri's forehead look like a birthmark to you?

If the seclusion and rumored airbrushing was because of this alleged birthmark, what are the specific reasons Tom and Katie kept Suri out of public? Were Tom and Katie afraid the public would focus in on the birthmark too much? Were they uncomfortable about it themselves? Could removal of the birthmark be another reason the wedding was delayed?

So, They're Married Or Whatever

Here are a bunch of pictures I'm stealing:





SAVE ME

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

SURI GETS MANICURE



awesome.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Tom/Katie Wedding This Weekend



So, they're getting married this weekend. In Rome. Blah Blah Blah. Watch me quote from news articles.

The 44-year-old actor and Holmes, 27, are set to marry in an undisclosed Italian location Saturday. Speculation on the location has focused on Odescalchi Castle on Lake Bracciano, near the capital. The romantic, 15th-century castle, with its halls and gardens, can host up to 1,400 guests.

blah blah blah

Despite reports that Katie's parents were upset when she converted to Scientology, ABC News has learned that Katie's father will give her away.

blah blah blah. why are you still reading this blog? who even cares about them anymore?

The 27-year-old Katie will wear a wedding gown made by one of the wedding's guests, designer Giorgio Armani.

Other stars planning to attend the event are actor Will Smith and wife Jada Pinkett Smith. Andrea Bocelli, the famous tenor from Tuscany, is expected to perform.


etc, etc.

Oh, looks like Oprah wasn't invited.

I still keep waiting for Tom to get real.


Hey, everyone, I'm straight. PSYCHE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I've Been Lazy

And slacking, because, well, Tom's been so caught up with being crazy, I felt Dakota was safe, at least for now.

Anyway, I received this comment today:

surely herparents will protect her from this egocentric jerkhes managed to wreck katie's career as well as his own LEAVE DAKOTA ALONE HER TALENT SURPASSESS TOM'S AND SHE DOESNT NEED HIM IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM. -A DAKOTA FANNING FAN

Now, I'm not entirely sure if it's Tom Cruise who is being insulted, or if *I* am supposed to leave Ms. Fanning alone.

So, I'd like to state: I have Ms. Fanning's best interest in mind. I have never tried to contact her, approach her, harass her, or upset her. My entire purpose for this blog was to keep the eyes and ears of the public open to the danger that Mr. Cruise poses.

Well, and to post snarky gossip. We can't all be Mother Teressa.

Anyway, I'll try to keep you abreast (snicker) of the situation.

But, I have to say, I'm pretty sure we're all bored with Cruise at this point.

Friday, November 10, 2006

HOW THE HELL DID THIS PICTURE HAPPEN?



I don't understand.